Write to Kyo Sohma!
by AesirSecrets
Summary: Hey. My name's Kyo Sohma, but DON'T THINK YOU'RE GETTING ANYTHING ELSE FROM ME! *sigh* Okay, okay. Write a letter to me. I'll try to answer as *sigh* calmly as I can. And send me stuff if you want, but I don't care. I'll probably just give it to that damn rat. -.- (Sorry for sucky summary... please give it a chance and I promise it'll be better! Thank You!)
1. Chapter 1

Well, whaddaya know. You actually came here. Thanks.

Now if I have to tell you who I am again, then you're probably an idiot and I'll probably have to just shove this leek up in your a-

**KYO! Be nice to the audience!**

WHAT DO _YOU_ KNOW, HUH? YOU'VE NEVER BEEN PUT OUT IN THE DAMN SPOTLIGHT LIKE THIS!

***Narrows eyes* *points two fingers at Kyo***

FINE ALREADY!

Write your letters to me! Any questions you have! Or comments!

BUT NONE ABOUT _PRINCE _YUKI!

If you do, I WILL take a leek and shove it up your-

***clears throat***

... RECTUM!

But thanks for choosing to write to an incredibly handsome person like me... or not choosing to write...

* * *

**Okay, that was a crappy first chapter. I'm still trying to get into Kyo's character. Any comments regarding his character and any helpful advice other than a letter/comment to we li'le Katty-Kins Kyo is greatly appreciated! **

**Thank you! **

**I'll only update when I get 5 reviews, as the chapters will be a mash of 5 letters/comments/gifts/randomness.**

**(PST... you can write about leeks and miso and Yuki if you want... it'll be funny to see Kyo's reaction...) XD**

**Oops... better not let Kyo find out about his nickname I just gave him... O.O**

**Ah, oh well. :)**

**I'll update THIS chapter when I think of a way to make it better...**


	2. Responses 1

**Barastone writes:**

_Herro, Kyo! _ How are you? fine? GOOD! Now my Question is, why do you hate leeks,miso,Yuki, this list is long..._

**Shigure replies: **_MY _list is waaay too long for most people to handle! ;)

Me: SHIGURE! Be a creepy pervert elsewhere and let Kyo answer!

**Kyo replies: **Thanks, Shigure -.-AND NO, I'M HORRIBLE! Kagura's stolen my favorite shirt and she won't give it back until I kiss her! I've been avoiding her for a while, but I don't know how long I can keep this up! Hopefully she doesn't find me here! If you know what's good for you, don't... say... a... WORD. Leeks are gross and they make my breath smell! I can't have Yuki having another reason to whine! Hey, Miso's okay as long as it's soup! But if it isn't soup, Miso's made of rice, barley, soybeans, soy, and fungus. That's just nasty. It's like... a Hatsuharu, Yuki, Hatori, Ayame, and Shigure all in one room and you gotta eat 'em all (although you girls would probably like that, wouldn't ya?). And Yuki's about the ugliest girl I've ever seen, and she's a rat. Enough said. NEXT!

* * *

**GreenWoods writes:**

_To- Kyo _  
_Say something nice about all the people you live with- that includes YUKI!_

_-Green_

**Kyo replies: **HAH! That doesn't include relatives that DON'T live with me! Just Shigure and Tohru and Yu- damnit. I hate you.

Tohru, you've still got the plum on your back. But now it has a little leaf thing on it. But it's really small, like a baby leaf thing. Like, it's real _real _small, though. Like, you can hardly even see it. Real. Freakin'. Small. *scratches back of head*

Shigure, you're still a pervert, but you have a nice house... good job on the designing... I guess... I know I keep messin' it up, BUT THAT WASN'T MY FAULT!

*GROOOOOOOOOOAN* Yuki, you don't smell like a girl as much today. Woo.

* * *

**Mika writes:**

_Dear Kyo,_

_What are some of the good things about being a cat? When you're in cat form are there any parts that are fun? Also, what is with your fascination with rooftops? Have you ever TRIED a leek to know you dont like it?_

_Love, Mika_

**Kyo replies: **Um. About leeks... Cats eat meat. Plus, all forms of onions or things related are bad for me, whether it's raw, dried, powdered, cooked. Let me know when a leek suddenly grows fur, sprouts claws, and starts growlin' at you because you look like a tasty little morsel, will ya?

*Yuki shoves a leek down Kyo's throat*

GODDAMNIT, YUKI, WHAT YOU TRYIN' TO KILL ME OR SOMETHIN'?

Yuki: You're being rude, she's just asking a question.

Kyo: There's no need to be a DRAMA QUEEN!

Yuki: Oh, are you talking about yourself again?

Kyo: You just like to hear yourself talk, don'tcha? Oh, you've done it NOW, GIRLY BOY! LET'S TAKE THIS OUTSIDE!

Me: STOW IT! THE BOTH OF YOU! THAT'S AN ORDER! UNDERSTAND?!

Kyo: *sigh* FINE. Anyways, what I like about being a cat is that I have super cool enhanced senses. Whenever someone's bein' an idiot (YUKI), I can hear them from a long way and it's really entertaining. And I also have really good reflexes. When I'm a cat, everything is sharper and I feel everything. It's really fun to jump off rooftops when I'm a cat. It's like I'm flying and I don't feel so bad anymore. Speaking of rooftops, we cats are natural hunters and they used to live in trees in the forests. Our claws and our flexible musculoskeletal system gives us great coordination and balance (don't ask how I know that). Since we've been higher up, I guess I just like being in the highest elevation possible for me at the time. It's much less crowded up there and usually people are too stupid to climb on a rooftop and not fall.

* * *

**danlove1998 **writes:

_This will be fun :D ...__

**Kyo replies: **Of course, it will, I'm KYO SOHMA! The EPITOME of fun! It's like... I _always _walk into the Zodiac Feast at New Years, and I say, "The party has arrived!" But then I get kicked out... guess I'm TOO fun for them... boring perverts...

STOP SNIGGERING, YOU DAMN RAT!

* * *

**Kagura writes:**

_KYO! MY LOVE! WHY HAVEN"T YOU BEEN CALLING ME?! DAMMIT, THE NEXT TIME I SEE YOU I'LL CRUSH YOU FOR MAKING ME WORRY SO MUCH!_  
_I love you, sweetie!_  
_Love,_  
_Kagura 3_  
_P.S. You'd better not cheat on me with anybody who sends you a letter._

**Kyo** **replies**: GAH! HOW'D YOU FIND ME HERE?! *shakes* DAMN IT! IT WAS PROBABLY DANLOVE1998 WHO TOLD YOU! His comment was sketchy... GIVE ME BACK MY SHIRT, DAMNIT! YOU'LL FIND NO LOVE IN _THIS _LETTER! If you come within a_ three mile _radius of me, I swear, I'll move to Romania! And then you'll NEVER find me!

* * *

**Thank you so much for reviewing, y'all! Once again, I won't update until I receive 5 more reviews! If you found the Pirates of the Caribbean reference, I will love you forever.**

**P.S. Kagura, I'm sure one day, Kyo will find in his heart that he truly loves you ^-^**

Kyo: YEAH RIGHT! MAYBE WHEN MY SKIN TURNS PINK!

Me: *holds up a permanent pink sharpie with creeper smile*

Kyo: Don't you dare!

Me: *creepier smile* HEH HEH HEH...


	3. Responses 2

**Author's Note: Okay, I'm going to cut this down to 4 reviews, because I realize 5 reviews is asking for too much. Thanks for asking Kyo questions! He LOVES it! :D Although he'll never admit it -.-**

* * *

**danlove1998 writes:**

_no it wasn't me and IM A GIRL you baka! but i wouldnt put you though that pain... yet_  
_anyways i was wondering have you ever been stuck in a tree?_

**Kyo replies: ** *only two dots as eyes seen on face and drop of sweat appears on left side of face* BLAME THE WRITER! You want her number? I got it, you can go stalk her!

Me: HEY! Don't give people my number! Or my address! Sorry for the gender mistake :$

Kyo: ANYWAYS. About getting stuck in a tree... *scratches back of head* yeaaaaah... BUT THAT WAS A LONG TIME AGO! I was six years old or something and I went on top of a real big pine tree and the branches were thin, so I kinda freaked out and my teacher had to catch me -.-

Me: Awww, that's so cuuuuute!

Kyo: THAT'S THE STUPIDEST THING I'VE EVER HEARD! And quit interrupting, this is called "Write to KYO SOHMA", not "Write to Kyo Sohma and Why Don't We Have a Girl Interrupt Every Damn Second?" Anyways, after that, I was much more careful. Wow, I miss him! Man, just THINKIN' about it gets me pumped up!

* * *

**Kagura writes:**

_Kyooooooooo! Are you flirting with Tohru-chan?_  
_..._  
_KYO, YOU MEANIE! YOU'RE A CHEATER! When I catch up to you..._  
_And be nice! After all, you're not supposed to yell at your future wife, sweetie! _  
_Love,_  
_Kagura 3_  
_P.S. Don't you dare think you can run from me..._

**Kyo replies: **HEY! I don't flirt with ANYONE! Now THAT'S gotta be the stupidest thing I've ever heard!

You WON'T catch up to me! I'm not yellin' at _anyone's _future wife right now! And don't call me sweetie! It's way too wussy! Now I know what it feels like to be Yuki... O.O

* * *

**RealmeNevertobeseen writes: **

_And Kyo, I was wondering what your favorite food is, and who's your favorite person not including your Master and Tohru. I'm a very curious person so I would love for you to reply. Bye bye XD!_

**Kyo replies: **I like chicken Tsukune best when it's simmered. They're like round dumplings with ground meat and other stuff. And I'd have to say... I like Hatsuharu too because I can kick his damn wussy ass any day! He never did fight me back that last time!

* * *

**ILOVESOULEATERKID writes:**

_Hey kyo YOU LOVE TOHRU DON'T YOU COME ON SAY IT _  
_AND DO YOU LIKE CANDY CAUSE I LIKE CANDY_  
_bye :3_

**Kyo replies: **I UH... UH... WELL...

I do like candy! Except Momiji steals most of it... But no one knows about the stash under my pillow! UH... I mean... I DO NOT HAVE A STASH OH SECRET CANDY. ESPECIALLY NOT UNDER MY PILLOW. THAT'S GOTTA BE THE STUPIDEST THING I'VE EVER HEARD.

* * *

Hey, if you guys are wonderin' why I have short answers, Yuki's constantly peeking over my shoulder up here! I have to minus the tab every fifteen seconds so he doesn't see! Can you guys like... tell him to stop?! I bet he'll do _anything _for someone in the Prince Yuki Fan Club, even wear a dress!

OW! HEY, CUT IT OUT, YOU DAMN RAT!


	4. Responses 3

**Author's Note: Hey guys, Kyo's been a bit stressed lately with Kagura and all that, so I do give my most sincere apologies if he snaps at you wonderful lovely reviewers! Remember, at least four reviews! ^-^ You guys have been amazing! **

* * *

**IfMyEyesLightUp writes:**

_Hey Kyo! _  
_1. I'm cheering for you to get Tohru...not Yuki. Go Kyohru!_  
_2. What is you favorite Anime Music Video of you? _  
_3. I really like the Kyo's Happy AMV...do you?_  
_Thanks Kyo33_  
_-Sky_  
_P.S. Stay healthy and far away from Kagura!_

**Kyo replies: **1) Uh... thanks O.O ...

2)I'd have to say my favorite AMV of me is 'Kyo's Bringing Sexy Back', and I think it totally fit-

Shigure: I LOOOOOVE 'Dont Cha Wish Your Girlfriend Was Hott Like Shigure?' by clarinetchk! High School girls, Hint Hint Hint! *he he he he*

Kyo: *GRRRRRRR* WHO CARES?!

And 3) the Kyo's Happy AMV really fits me! To be honest, I thought it was gonna be an idiotic video made by moronic people high on sugar... but the ending... classic me! Couldn't stop laughing... Ya know, I don't say this to a lotta people, but thanks for bringing that up to me :D

P.S. Let's hope Kagura doesn't message me again! EVERY DAMN DAY!

And Sky's a cool name.

* * *

**guest writes:**

_Why were you the only one that ever took Haru to the bathroom? _

_is it because you actually care but you dont wanna show it, Kyo-chan?_

**Kyo replies: **Yeah, I only took him to the bathroom, though, nothin' special or something. And NO, it's not because I CARE! It's because I just didn't want to see another idiot piss their pants! I always had to clean it up because all the other people were too much of a WUSSY to do it! _Do you know what it's LIKE to have to clean up boy-piss that's been sticking their pants to their legs?!_ YOU deal with the smell when you try it! See how YOU like it then!_ -.- _

_*_sigh* Okay. That was a bit dramatic. I guess what I'm tryin' to say is... I'M SOR- Oh look, another message!

* * *

**Furubafan95 writes:**

_So, this might be a sensitive topic, but..._  
_What do you think of the yaoi fanfic stories about you and yuki? And be honest!_

**Kyo replies: **... They're almost as bad as the videos.

I MEAN... they're weird! Why do people even THINK of such dumb-ass things?! We're _cousins! _I'm NOT gay!

Yuki: You are always gay.

Kyo: WILL YOU GUYS STOP INTERRUPTING MY REPLIES?!

Shigure: Nevah! HEHEHEHE! ^-^ *goes off into the distance singing "High school girls, high school girls... ALL FOR ME! High school giiiirls!"*

* * *

**danlove1998 writes: **

_Kyo i hate to inform you but Kagura just stole all your candy (and gave it to Momiji) because she want to be the only sweat thing in you life... but look on the bright side i brought you 2 pounds of candy to make up for it... oh by the way RUN cause Kagura is coming this way_

**Kyo replies: **WHAT?! THAT DAMN BOAR! MOMIJIIIIIIIII! DAMN IT he's not answering!

YAY! Did you bring those weird cinnamon stick things that are like peppermint sticks but not really? WHEW! Good thing my human side can take over when I eat candy; cat's can't really taste candy.

OH HELL, I'M OUTTA HERE!

* * *

**Kagura writes:**

_You know, Yun-chan's just making sure you're not being lovey-dovey to anyone but me! Oh, and don't worry, I'll make you chicken tsukune every day once we move in together! And I'll catch you every time you fall out of a tree, because I love you even though you're so clumsy, silly!  
Bye, Kyo-chan, my love!  
Kagura_

**Shigure replies: **Oh hey Kagura! *waves hand absentmindedly* Were you looking for Kyo? Geez, well, Kyo's not here! I think he went to go to some other strange country! I heard Romania has a lot of good-looking girls! Especially the high-school ones! Oh hey, you could always just stay here until he comes back, maybe we can play some game-

Yuki: Shigure, stop it. You're a perv.

Shigure: *singsong voice* Tell me something I don't know, DAHHHLING!


	5. Responses 4

**Jaded Green Dragon writes:**

_Who was the first person you beat up at the dojo besides from Haru, Kagura, (and yuki? lol) or anyone that is a Sohma?_

_How did Kazuma react? was he proud of ya? How did you react, Kyo-chan?_

**Kyo replies: **HAHAHA! I never beat up Yuki. -.- sadly... BUT I'LL BEAT THAT DAMN RAT ONE DAY!

Yuki: Wait, wait, I think I've heard that one before!

Kyo: SHUT UP! *sigh* I WAS gonna say Haru, but I guess before I beat him, I kicked ass outta some air molecules.

Shigure: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Kyo: *dark cloud appears over head* HE WAS VERY PROUD OF ME! And I felt like I could beat that damn rat! So I went over to him and fought...

Yuki: That didn't work out too well for you, did it?

Kyo: ...

* * *

**pinksugarrush writes:**

_When was the first time you got sick when you were staying with Kazuma? _  
_How did you get sick (besides from his cooking)? :) _

_Did you tell him that you were sick or did he have to figure it out?_

_Did Kazuma freak out? How did he help you?_

**Kyo replies: **Uh... we had another person's leftovers and Kazuma heated it up in the microwave. It appears he can't even use a microwave...

But yeah, he freaked out. I was sick for three days, barfin' and stuff, and then he caught me doin' it and he got real mad 'cause I didn't say anything to him. Then he just gave me some tea. It didn't really help much, it just tasted good.

* * *

**snowflake2410 writes:**

Omg_ kyo I love you sooooo mch! I do martial arts tooo!willl you marry me_

**Kyo replies: **GUESS WHAT?! That makes two of us! I love me too!

What style Martial Arts are you? What belt? How long have you been in it? Do you like it? Do you LOVE it? _Do you CRAVE it with every single fiber in your weird body?! _Man, just talkin' about it gets me pumped up!

Me: You've said that before. -.-

Kyo: Well now, I'm sayin' it AGAIN!

* * *

**idontwannalogin writes:**

_hav u ever farted? do u look at girls asses? weird question...i know..._  
_u better not yell at me either and answer my question because ill shred your head into bloody pieces and kick ur ass through the ceiling! _  
_ok let me calm down..._  
_oh yeah, my friend asked would u ever f*ck anyone. [shes a weird person] make sure u answer!_

**Kyo replies:** Uh... everyone farts. And YEAH, I guess! I mean, what guy DOESN'T look at girl's body parts?!

Shigure: Yay! My little Kyon Kyon's finally embraced his inner pervert!

Kyo: DON'T CALL ME THAT! And I HARDLY think you can shred up my head and kick my ass! I've been in Martial Arts longer than you! MAN, you have a temper almost as bad as mine!

And it depends who I'd be doin' it with and HEY! AESIRSECRETS! Why'd you censor the word? It's not like everyone's innocent and hasn't seen it!

Me: Yes, but I still think it's nice to be censored! ^-^

Kyo:... Whatever. But yeah. Depends on who it is. And your friend's a weird-ass.

* * *

**ILOVESOULEATERKID writes:**

_KYO YOU AVOIDED THE QUESTION so do you like, like Tohru and this is for fangirl purpose have you seen haru shirtless and felt strangly attrackted to him XD_

**Kyo replies: **Why you gotta make me answer?! Yeah, I like her! You HAPPY now?! *tries to get away, but I grab him by the collar*

Me: Not so fast, lover boy!

Kyo: DAMN IT! And yeah, I've seen Haru shirtless! What, you want a full-blown detailed description of his CHEST or somethin'?! I'VE never been attracted to him even with his shirt off, but Tohru's eyes went wide and he laughed and asked if she's like to see how that airhead glasses guy found out that that's Haru's natural hair color. I had to jump in; that stupid Haru wasn't gonna let up.

* * *

**Thank you for reviewing, my lovelies! Remember, four reviews! Although I have to add a couple of chapters... **


	6. Responses 5

**Author's Note: I'M SO SORRY for the ridiculously long wait! Kyo had to get his computer set up, and well... I have no excuse. I was busy. Hope you enjoy and please review if Kyo doesn't scare you too much! PSH, who am I kidding?! He's so *cute*, how could he be _scary?_**

**Kyo: ...I'll pretend like I didn't see that.**

* * *

**Kagura writes:**

_Byyyyyyyyyyye, Shii-chan! I'm off to Romania!_

_-Kagura_

**Shigure replies: **I... don't... think.. he's in... Romania...

**Kyo: **THAT'S RIGHT! I FINALLY got my computer to work without being traced to where I am! HA!

* * *

**Ruthie writes: **

_This is an ingeniously creative and an original means to do a fanfic. What I love most about this series of Q & A's is that it is incredibly amusing to read them aloud and in character. This is very funny! Oh... and here's my question: If you're so athletic and fit, how come you don't join a school club that engages you in sporty activities? It'll give you opportunities to become better at socializing with others (which you kinda' need) and, who knows, it might even give you some extra practice in karate (And yes, I know you should be careful about getting in contact with girls)._

**Kyo replies: **Thanks! I admit, I am pretty damn funny. This was totally my idea.

**Me: ***AHEM*

**Kyo: **Yeah, totally my idea. AND I DON'T NEED TO SOCIALIZE! Most people there are too STUPID to talk to! It's always Yuki Yuki Yuki! This school doesn't have a track type deal, which is really what's up if I wanna do somethin. But yeah, I'm really fit. ;) Now if Tohru would-

Nevermind.

* * *

**ThatOneChickWhoWritesFanfic writes:**

_Dear Kyo;_  
_If you weren't possessed by the spirit of the cat, do you think your personality would be the same?_

**Kyo replies: **Yes.

**Me: **Only one word?

**Kyo: **Yes.

* * *

**sb. animelover writes:**

_So...hav u ever fallen off the roof? Do u hate ur father enough to kill him? Who do u really love?do u drink soda? Do u hate Shigure? I think hes a perv...and will u ever finish the fight between u and haru? im waiting..._

**Kyo replies: **I have... fallen off the... roof. YUKI, SHUT UP! YOU'RE A REAL WISE-ASS, YOU KNOW THAT?! ANYWAYS. I'm not really sure what to think of my father except that he's a damn asshole, but my master taught me to main rather than kill. I LOVE ME. I rarely drink soda, except when I'm around Yuki and I wanna belch really loud in his face. Sometimes I wanna just knock Shigure through the roof!

**Shigure: **Why, how vulgar! I remember when you first came here, you were always such a sweet innocent little kitten, so cute and fluffy and you licked your wrists sometimes when you though no one was looking... *nobody knows what he says from here because we all zone out on his nonsense rambling*

**Kyo: **He is the biggest perv I've ever MET. Except for AesirSecrets. And HELL YES I'LL FINISH THE FIGHT! I'll go over to his house and MAKE him finish it, that little PUNK! And yeah, I was waiting for a long time too... NO THANKS TO AESIRSECRETS.

**Me: **HEY I WAS BUSY. And sorry for putting a space in your username, it wouldn't show if I put your username like it is... I guess Fanfiction thinks it's an email :P

* * *

**danlove1998 writes: **

_Finally i caught up i think i got her off your trail, anyways look ( holds up 12 pounds of all different types of candy (except any type of mint or peppermint or even spearmint)) sorry there is no mint i used them as traps, plus i can't stand mint its like you with leeks oh yeah btw i also used the leek candy as traps._

**Kyo replies: **YES! THANKS! 12 pounds of pure pleasure! Yeah, she won't try to get me to kiss her NOW! It's fine I guess... As long as there's no leek candy. WHO THE HELL MADE THE IDEA OF LEEK CANDY?!


	7. Responses 6

**Uotani writes: **

_So, orange-top you havin' fun answering all these questions?_

**Kyo replies: **Yeah, and I'll beat your ass in rich man poor man! Just you wait!

* * *

**animefreak2797 writes:**

_Hi Kyo :)_  
_I wanna know..._  
_1) What are the qualities you like in a girl?_  
_2) If you could be any other Zodiac animal which one would you be?_  
_3) If you had 3 wishes and could wish for anything in the world what would they be?_  
_Thanks Kyo_  
_Love, Me XD_

**Kyo replies: **I don't really know what qualities I like in a girl, I never really thought about it. And I would be the zodiac animal that's not a zodiac animal.

**Me and Shigure and Yuki: **You already are, you stupid cat.

**Kyo: **SHUT UP! You guys are real slick, ya know?! What I MEAN is I'd not wanna be a zodiac animal AT ALL. Do you know how hard it is with the cat prying into your mind and influencing mostly every thing ya do? Do you know how hard it is to not hug girls?! And 1) I'd wish for being a normal human being, 2) for leeks to forever die, and 3) for paper to start jumping up and dancing to a Russian Polka with a guy that looks like Rasputin. Don't ask.

* * *

**Kyo is awesome writes:**

_Hey Kyou, did you get yer shirt back? I hope so cuz i dont want you to get cold! Any who Do you like One direction? . if not ura bum_

**Kyo replies: **No, I didn't get my favorite shirt back. I will NEVER kiss Kagura even if she destroys all the leeks and leek seeds for me! And I go multiple directions. I don't go one direction with their girlfriends like most every other boy. I'm not a perv, unlike Shigure. Did that answer your question?

* * *

**ILOVESOULEATERKID writes:**

_Awww Tohru listen to this KYO LOVES YOU HAHA Don't worry I locked kagura up KISS TOHRU KYO AREN'T YOU A MAN OR KISS YUKI_

**Kyo replies: **... No.

YOU LOCKED UP KAGURA?! FINALLY! THANK YOU SO MUCH!

And I will NEVER kiss Yuki either! But if I kiss Tohru, it'll be like face rape! You don't wanna make me a _face raper, _do ya?! o.O


	8. Responses 7

**Author's Note: Imma just put NEARLY all of the remaining reviews in this here document because I need to catch the number of chapters up with the reviews and little chapters just ain't gonna do it this time.**

**I suddenly have this idea of doing a Kyo and reader pairing ****fic...**

**Kyo: YOU CAN'T DO THAT, YOU IDIOT, YOU HAVE ENOUGH TO WRITE, NOW GET WRITING.**

**Me: HOT DAMN KYO, you'd think someone stole your ****girlfriend!**

**Yuki: _What _girlfriend?  
**

**Me: Ooooh, nice one. I like your style. *fist bump***

* * *

**Uotani writes: (about Kyo beating her ass in rich man poor man)**

_Yeah right. You don't stand a danm chance! Maybe, I should invite that Kagura girl...? :)_

**Kyo replies: **NO. Don't invite Kagura! She's not supposed to know where I am! And you're just a cheater! SO HA! ON YOU!

* * *

**Arisa Uotani and Saki Hanajima writes:**

_Arisa: hey orange top, when are we going to finish that game of rich man poor man. I've been waiting to kick your sorry ass again!_

**Kyo replies: **We're going to finish it now. *shuffles cards* C'MON, BRING IT! Or are you too much of a _sissy? _

* * *

**LeoValdezgirl77 writes:**

_ok lots of random questions...  
1) What is your favorite subject in school?  
2) What is your favorite color?  
3) Would you rather be trapped in an enclosed space with Yuki or Kagura?  
4) What's your favorite song?  
5) Do you find it upsetting to eat animal crackers? Would you if they were cat-shaped?  
6) On a scale of one to ten, ten being the most, how much do you like Tohru?  
7) What's your most embarrasing memory?_

And because seven is a good number Imma stop there.  
You're awesome, Kyo!  
I love you!

**Kyo replies: **Favorite subject: lunch. Duh. 2) I guess green. It reminds me of grass and I like to smell grass especially in the morning, but it kinda sucks when there's like little pellets of- never mind! 3) I'd rather be with YUKI because then I can KICK HIS GIRLY ASS! I can't really hit a girl.

Me: But you can insult one? Like what you did with Tohru in the beginning, hmmmmmmmmm?

Kyo: *blushes* HEY! She was kind of an idiot!

Me: Better not let Tooooooohruuuu hear this ;)

Kyo: O.O MOVING RIGHT ALONG. 4) My favorite song... is... the good one. 5) HELL NO, ANIMAL CRACKERS ARE FREAKING DELICIOUS. But yeah, I guess I'd be upset if they were cat shaped. HEY! Maybe I should put a recommendation in for a RAT shaped animal cracker...

6)

7)

Seven is a good number. And guess what's an even _better _number? _FIVE!_ O.O

I know I'm awesome.

I love me too.

Me: WHAT HE MEANT TO SAY WAS "Thank you for writing to me, I really appreciate it your effort, dear one!"

Kyo: *SNORT* WHATEVER, YOU BAKA!

Me: HOT DAMN, KYO, IT'S LIKE SOMEONE INSULTED YOUR GIRLFRIEND!

Yuki: Oh, you mean the girlfriend that isn't his?

Me: OOOH DAMN Yuki _I like your style! _*yet another fist bump*

* * *

**MinatepesakaToruhslittlesis writes:**

_Hello I am Mina Tepes if you alredy haven't read my name and i would like to ask you if you really love my sister and if you don't... oh yah my other sister wanted to say if your Kazumas kid aka your master. Because I was the one who taught him how to fight yet i never been tought myself._

**Kyo replies: **Uhm... yeah, Kazuma's my master. He's flippin_ awesome_.

YOU TAUGHT HIM TO FIGHT?! O.O

YO! I wanna meet you!

Shigure: *flips hand and talks in singsong voice* Let's keep this G, okay? ^-^

Kyo: I'M NOT LIKE YOU!

* * *

**purpledragonflamegirl writes:**

_Hey Kyo Sohma! :-D  
First things first...Ever since my friend introduced me to fruits basket, i got the first volume and i gotta say YOU HOT no matter in the anime or manga! So my question from that statement/compliment is how do you feel about having so many Kyo fans?  
Kagura beats you up. And Tohru takes care of you and the gang, my second question is: Who would you rather be paired up with and why?  
This one is a no brainier: Do you wish you had your own year?  
If you are aware of the yoai pairings...are you as pissed off as i am? I mean KyoxYuki=BARF  
Do you wish that fruits basket didn't end? I know we furba fans basket people do!  
My final one is: in volume six,episode 25, where you deeply afraid of losing Tohru? Did you cry? Why?  
LUV purpledragonflamegirl (you can call me Daisy Hays, or Canada!)  
P.S You are awesomer than Prussia from Hetalia...if you,tohru,Yuki,shigure and the other sohma's where Hetalia characters, who would you think they'll be?  
P.P.S. You don't have to answer the last one in the P.S. but the rest you do. Or else i will send the lich, Hudson abedeer or even the cosmic owl to your home it worse RUSSIA!  
P.P.P.S. Just kidding but do answer the ones you know the answers to k  
P.P.P.P.S.  
KYO SOHMA YOU ROCK!_

**Kyo replies: **HOLY CRAP that's a lot of questions.

OH THANKS I'm always flipping excited knowing that someone sees me for how I am... totally hot ;P

Me: Kyo, stop being a narcissistic ass and answer her god damn questions.

Kyo: AesirSecrets, stop being a tease and UPDATE THIS DAMN FANFICTION MORE OFTEN.

Shigure: Ooh, good one! *fist bump with Kyo*

Me: *British accent* Why must you hurt me this way, Shigure? T.T

Kyo: MOVING THE HELL ALONG.

I'd rather be paired with my bed. We have a great relationship going on. I flipped my pillow to the other side last night, so I guess I could say things are getting pretty serious.

Me and Shigure: Ahhhh not paired with TOHRU, EHHHH?!

Kyo *blushing* SHUT UP! YOU TWO ARE REAL WISE-ASSES, YOU KNOW THAT?!

YES I wish I had my own year. Then on the anniversary of my year-making, I'd make everyone eat fifteen pounds of leeks... for breakfast.

As for the yaoi pairings, I don't like them AT ALL, but AesirSecrets loves them.

Me: HEY! I don't like yaoi! I like _yuri _*drools*

Kyo: Like I said, she loves yaoi.

I KNOW, AesirSecrets practically had a freaking heart attack when she found out there wasn't like 80 episodes like all the other animes she watches! But _I'm_ still here :D

Was I deeply afraid of losing Toh- let's skip this one.

Thanks... I don't even know who Prussia is... but thanks? I don't watch Hetalia and neither does AesirSecrets.

If you want, I can hold her down and we can tie her up and force her to watch it if that's cool with you!

Thanks for not makin me answer all of these.

My head hurts.

Me: AWWW, is poor kyun-kyun tired of all the haaaaard wooooooooooooork of thiiiiiiiinking? :(

(mockery, young fools)

* * *

**TohruandYukiforever writes:**

_Okay you I'm more of a Yuki fan but here a question for you you Stupd Cat.  
Why do u hate Yuki SO much? Is becasue of the bet you made with Akito?  
You know he was trying to be your friend becasue well he kinds of knows how it is. And who scars u more Uo Hana or Kagura aka Crazy woman? By the way your one of fav. Sohma's you and Yuki are neck to neck 99% of the time._

**Kyo replies: **HEY! I am NOT a stupid cat! Yuki's just a JACKASS! He pretends to be all light and love and all this crazy stuff and EVERYONE loves the damn rat! It gets _annoying _when you have fangirls screaming in your ear about what kind of underwear he wears at night! As if _I'd _know!

And I seriously doubt he wanted to be my friend!

Me:... that actually hurt my feels, bro...

Kyo: Uh... I'm sor-

KAGURA.

HANDS DOWN.

She scares me to death. She goes wide-eyed and kinda cute to crazy tractor with sharp teeth!

Thanks, but I'm pretty sure I'd win by a dirtslide if there was a poll that says who is awesomer, me or Yuki.

Me: You mean _landslide? _

Kyo: Yeah, that's what I said, dirtslide.

* * *

**Mommy Hanajima writes:**

_I feel a strange presence around you as you talk. -.- perhaps an evil preesence?_  
_And I've been meaning to ask you something as well_  
_Why won't you admit your love for Tohru-chan? If you break her heart I will break you from the inside out *.*_

_Love, Mommy Hanajima_

**Kyo replies: **It's not evil, it's just... my temper. I can't admit it to her or-

Me: You have no excuse.

Kyo:... yeah, you're right. I swear I'll try not to break her heart.

* * *

**Keira Higurashi9 writes:**

_When was the first time you got drunk! And you gotta be truthful! And was it with Shigure!_

Love-  
Keira Higurashi9 :D

P.S I LOVE YOU! ;D

_Please__ post soon! And another thing, Kyo, has a dog ever chase you around (that is not Shigure)_

**Kyo replies: **I never drink! Alcohol, that is. Sadly. It would have been fun :(

And yeah. I was walking in the forest again and this dumb-ass dog suddenly jumped on me and started growlin'. I wrestled it off, but I smelled like disgusting dog for the rest of the day. Shigure started licking me in weird spots... I think it was a female dog O_O *traumatized*

* * *

**Haikai23 writes:**

_Hey Kyo!  
If I could I would just hug you right now but you can see how that won't work out! XD lol_

So off to asking you my questions:  
1) Do you like fried chicken? ..cause I do. Its like the best DAMN. FOOD IN THE WORLD! umm...okay maybe not the best-...Well who am I kidding IT IS! .  
2) YOU MUST ANSWER THIS** At least tell me THREE things that is admirable about Yuki AND Kagura! ! ...okay 2 things! ! But that's all I'm settling for! XP

Sincerely,  
Your most questionable questioner

P.S. How are you today?

**Kyo replies: **YES I DO LIKE CHICKEN. I LIKE YOUR CRAZY ENTHUSIASM. Have you been drinking with Shigure?

How about 1 and a half things?

Me: NO.

Kyo: OH YEAH? And who's to STOP me, you little _punk_?!

Me: Kagura.

Kyo: How about four things?

1) Yuki has some nice flower-smelling shampoo

2) Kagura could save a lot of work for lumberjacks because she could plow through an entire forest

3) Yuki... has a way with even the men

Me: You're really pushing it, small fry!

4) Kagura... (wow, this is hard) she's smart enough to bring me candy when she USED to visit!

And I'm freakin fantastic. Eating an ice-cream sandwich with AesirSecret's cat on my lap. I actually don't mind it. I was going to get up and get a blanket because it's FREEZING here but I don't have to with a cat-blanket on me.

* * *

**WoNdErLaNd Or NeVeRlAnD writes:**

_HIII KYO! ( I suck at asking questions...so be warned!) _

_Ok, so theres 12 animals in the zodiac (and you apart.) And sadly theres no other animals. If you could add animals to the zodiac...which would you add? And I saw a creepy picture of a yaoi with you and hatsu haru (don't ask what it had I'm still traumatized by it X(...) And even though it's mostly youxYuki (I think that's the most common...IDK) what do you think of that? I actually find it KAWAII! XD _

_And random question: HOW WOULD YOU REACT IF YOU SAW A THREESOME OF THE MABUDACHI (however the hell it's spelled) TRIO? O.O I would melt..._

_P.s. I WUV YOU! I WOULD LOVE TO HAVE A LITTLE BROTHER LIKE YOU! XD Your hair is awesome too...just saying..._

**Kyo replies: **I really don't know what I'd add. This family has enough weirdos, I don't think I could handle it-

Me: WHAT. YOU SAW KYO AND HARU?! Tell me where *evil grin* and I will spare your life *evil grin*

Kyo: I'm seriously beginning to doubt your love of 'just' yuri.

ANYWAYS. I HATE the Yuki and Kyo pair-

Me: I LOVE THEM! I like your style, WoNdErLaNd Or NeVeRlAnD! We should get together! I _totally _think it's Kawaii too! YAY! *excited squeal*

Also, I would ADORE a threesome of those guys! Kyo, whaddayu think?! (I'm so excited now, you made my night)

Kyo: Do you even HAVE to ask?! *turns green*

I dunno about me being your brother, but thanks!

I... never had a compliment... for my... hair... O.O

Me: *whisper* I think he likes it :D

* * *

**Teh Pockzter writes:**

_Yo, Kyo-kun! Wazzup? Lemme ask ya a few questions. Answer them or you'll suffer.  
1. Do you have any friendly or romantic feelings towards Yuki? AND BE HONEST! Otherwise I'll take your journal and give it to Yuki... *snicker*  
2. If you, Yuki and Shigure were alone on an island with no chances of survival, who would you kill first?  
3. How do you feel when Yuki's near Tohru? Again, BE HONEST, or I'll throw you some punches Kagura taught me.  
4. Do you like pocky? If so, what flavour do you think suits you best?  
With love from everyone's favourite otaku, Pocky_

**Kyo replies:**

YO! Nothin much, you?!

AND I'LL DO WHATEVER THE _HELL _I WANT!

1. Why would I have romantic feelings for Yuki.

Me: Oh yeah! I've looked up you and Yuki fan art and some look amazing! I can't help it! You guys look so sexy when your shirts are off and you guys are _trying so hard _to be mean, but _just can't, _and you guys caress each other lovingly but begrudgingly and some pictures, you two have your pants on the flo-

Kyo: _YOU'RE JUST AS BAD AS SHIGURE!_

2. I'd kill me first. I wouldn't want to be living with them ALONE.

3. I want to BEAT THE CRAP outta that wise-ass! AesirSecrets, let's go do it now!

Me: Actually, I'm beginning to like him *content evil smile*

Kyo: _WHAT?!_

4. I like the kinako flavor of Pocky. I don't know why. HELL, I DON'T EVEN LIKE SOYBEAN! WHAT THE HELL?!

Me: This just proves you're insane. :D

Kyo: -.- NO.

* * *

**The Grimm Maiden writes:**

_Hey Kyo, I have a good three questions for you: 1. If you had to be trapped in a room with Yuki, Haru, Kagura, or Momjji who would YOU choose? 2. Why do you Kagura so much (besides the fact that she is crazy)? 3. Would you allow Tohru to bear your children?_

**Kyo replies: **1) OH GOD Don't ask me such horrifying questions of me! They burn my eyes! I would choose NONE of them! HA ON YOU! 2) I HATE her because she's crazy and unpredictable! 3) WUT. *-*

* * *

**EpIcScReAmIcA writes:**

_i heard u fell off the roof from my sister! Did it really hurt? whats ur fav candy? If Yuki died how would u feel? what if kagura did? why are u so self-conceited? whats the lowest grade u hav ever gotten. how are u going to school wit all this mail?_

**Kyo replies: **YEAH IT HURT! Lemme throw _you _off the roof, it ain't a bunch of daisies! I don't really know. I mean, he's fun to beat up and all, but I don't know if I could handle him being dead. I might have seizures from extreme boredom. If Kagura died, I'd feel the same way. I mean, it SUCKS RAW EGG when she's here, but no one deserves to die if they don't have to. My master said to maim rather than kill! OH YEAH, BUT _NOW _I'M ABOUT TO MAIM SOME SERIOUS RAT ASS!

I am NOT self-conceited! I just say it like it is.

C.

Surprised?

Yeah, everyone is -.-

Exactly, I'm not going to school.

So much work... it's so tiring... I think my soul will be forever done for...

Me: QUIT YOUR WHINING, YOU BIG BABY. Mostly, I copy and paste and Kyo writes in this stuff when he has free time. Although this recent huge pause was completely my fault, because I didn't put your guys' letters until tonight because of homework and a sudden relationship popped up that was COMPLETELY unexpected. Sorry guys :|

Kyo: _YOU'RE IN A RELATIONSHIP?!... _I thought you'd be alone... forever...

AND YEAH YOU BETTER BE SORRY!

* * *

**TohruKyoYuki writes:**

_Kyo who was the first person you've had a crush on? If Yuki weren't the rat would you still feel the same? Any other hobbies aside from Martial Arts and Fighting Yuki? ;)_

**Kyo replies: **Tohru's the first person I- NEVERMIND.

I'd still feel the same because his girly style pisses the hell out of me! There _are_ other things I like, but I don't think _you'd _really care or any _other_ person for that matter...

* * *

**Jaded Green Dragon writes:**

_if you were forced between living with these three people, who would you pick? Why?_

_Shigure, Hatori, or Ayame. _

_And lets just all say that they all live away from the Main House. _

_Also, who would make the best guardian? Lover? _

_Keke_

**Kyo replies: **You... you ask weird-ass questions of me.

I'd pick Hatori.

He doesn't say much anyways, so that's cool. Also, Ayame and Shigure are too busy humping each other, so I wouldn't want to be the one listening to them from all the way downstairs.

Me: *WATER SPURTS OUT OF NOSE*

Kyo: Hatori would make the best guardian. People get scared of him anyways, so that's cool.

O.O Let's ask AesirSecrets for the last one. Caitlyn? Which one do you think will make the best lover?

Me: SHIGURE. HE'S SO SEXY. And we are both perverts, so we're perfect for each other! In fact, the other day, we went to your guys' high school and we started skipping and singing 'High School Girls' and BOY did I see some hot ones ;DDDDD

Kyo: ... I wish I never asked.

* * *

**IByte199820 writes:**

_Omg kyo :D I'm so glad I get to speak to you I've always wanted to! Your my favorite character from Fruits Basket! I always like Yuuki but suddenly I realized Yuuki is way to "good" and he's cute and all but ya know I realized he looks way to much like a girl that I was able to use him as a girl in an amv. Any way. Your totally fucking awesome kyo. So I have some questions for you. Okay so how do you feel about the fanfictions about you and Yuuki being together. Like in one I found which was really weird Yuuki got catnip on him and you like sexually jumped him and it put a whole new meaning to boynip 0.0 . Question Number two, if Yuuki ended up with like shigure (sorry but that's anothe pod pilar pairing) or Yuuki who would you have married? Is there any other girl you like? Also my mom told me to invite you to dinner tomorrow night. I'm make riceballs and leek soup -snicker snicker-_

**Kyo replies: **Thanks! It's pretty dang cool seeing how many people actually want to talk to me! You ... you have good taste. I agree with you, Yuki is WAAAAAAAY too girly. I saw him walking around with a _strawberry hair towel O.O ..._

WOAH I LIKE YOUR LANGUAGE!  
OH MY GOD WHY DO PEOPLE ASK THIS ALL THE TIME...

Me: Probably because they want to piss you off. Anywho, that's the only reason why I'D keep asking you those questions *evil grin*

Kyo: They're like leeks to me! DESTROY! But I'm sure you can tell AesirSecrets the name or whatever the fiction was and she'll leave me alone for a second and go all Miss DroolFace while reading it.

Me: *nods vigorously* That story sounds fun!

Kyo: That's weird... I never heard of Yuki being with Shigure... oh well, Shigure _is _a pervert, so I wouldn't really be surprised!

Wait, what?

Do you mean if _I_ ended up with Yuki or Shigure?! That's the STUPIDEST thing I ever heard!

NO I don't like anyone else!

*shudder* NO I'M GOOD, I'LL PASS. Here. Have an ass on a cone instead. 3

Wait, that _is _an ass on a cone, right?

AesirSecrets, if you told me the wrong thing, I SWEAR.

Me: *cackles to no end*

* * *

**Saki writes:**

_Why are your waves so funny...? I sense cat energy...could you be a cat?_

**Kyo replies: **Uh... uh... no, uh... cats just... really love me. Yeah, they're like... they're just really attracted to my... kind caring freaking amazing attitude.

Me: *SNORT*

* * *

**IF ANY OF YOU GOT THE LITTLE MERMAID 2 REFERENCE, Kyo will personally write you a song. He will post it as a chapter or send you a PM, just specify which!**

**GOD This copying and pasting killed me.**

**Kyo: Sucks for you. You decided to do this, now deal with it.**

**Me: Hey, did y'all notice Kyo get all serious when Mommy Hanajima talked about Toooooohruuuuu? ;) ;) ;)**

**Kyo: SHUT THE HELL UP!**

**Me: OMG I CAN'T GET ENOUGH OF YUKI ROMANCE FANFICTIONS... **

**Kyo:...**

**Me: oops...**


	9. Responses 8

**XxDarkCorexX writes:**

_How would u feel if u got raped an u never knew it? lol. Do u like ur hair orange or would u dye it a different color. How r u using the bathroom wit all dis mail...ur not shitting urself r u?_  
_Srry, I'm weird, but not as weird as Yuki, he creeped me out in the beginning when he was all like_  
_"It's a Secret."_  
_Then suddenly I imagined him as a rapist or a stalker..._  
_But when I first saw u I didn't think of u that way, I thought u were hot and that u were better than Yuki cuz Yuki looks like a girl._  
_But what would u do if u found out Yuki was a girl!?_  
_lol, this is long but I really do type a lot. lol,_  
_oh...and if u don't answer, they'll be serious consequences...very serious..._

**Kyo replies: **If i never knew I got raped, I wouldn't feel anything, now would I? :D I guess I'm fine by my hair. Never really thought about changing my hair, but if I did, I guess I'd try a blond or black or whatever.

These replies only take like an hour to write. The shorter chapters are like half an hour, so I'm not really packed for time or anything like that, I am not shitting you on this.

THANK YOU! FINALLY, someone who understands the full extent of Yuki's weirdness! I do have the awesome tendency of making freaking cool entrances. If I found out he was a girl, I would scream "I KNEW IT!" and show everyone pictures of Yuki in her bikini.

You know Yuki is a unisex name? That might be a huge clue...

It's cool, I'm gettin better with typing and I kinda like it.

DAMN I shouldn't have answered and waited to see what I got... BRING IT ON!

* * *

**Guest writes:**

_Hello Carrot-Top!_  
_Get a haircut you hippie! :) _  
_Hmm, maybe I should shut my mouth now (ponders for a second..)_  
_LOL NOPE._  
_Anyway, why are you hating on Haru?_  
_I personally think he's awesome, and you just have some severe anger issues._  
_You should get that checked out._  
_On to reasons why Haru is awesome!_  
_1. He just is_  
_2. Dat hair color :3_  
_3. He has great style. (I would totally wear black everyday, but it's too hot where I live)_  
_4. Dude, like, reinvented the poker face._  
_5. He has grey eyes (I really don't know why, but I like guys with grey eyes)_  
_6. He's cool and calm (When he doesn't snap.)_  
_7. He isn't afraid to get angry (When he does snap.)_  
_You would be my favorite character, but you cuss too much._  
_(Did you know, cussing is a sign of low intelligence? I saw that on a psychological show once)_  
_Sorry if I was a little harsh, :)._  
_You're cool, sometimes._  
_-Skylar (Girl, 15, thank you very much)_

**Kyo replies: **Yo! Wassup?

NO! I like my hair! And so do the two fangirls I have!

YEAH, SHUT YOUR TRAP!

He's just fun to fight! It's not like I really hate him like Yuki, but he's really annoying sometimes and pervy too.

HEY! My anger issues are better! I can actually say 'thanks' now! Thanks, Tohru!

That is a long list.

WELL THANKS.

Some say they like it when I cuss! Anyways, what the hell does that mean, 'low intelligence'? I have A's and B's, ya know. AesirSecrets has all A's and she's in AP classes and she cusses like a sailor! But yeah, I guess you could say she's stupid in her own way...

Me: HEY! WHAT THE _HELL _is _THAT _supposed to mean?!

Kyo: Exactly my point. But nah, I get your point there. Most cussers are pretty stupid.

-Kyo Sohma (Guy, 17, you're welcome very much)

* * *

**the sakura trees writes:**

_What would you do if a bunch of fangirls would come to you and ask for autographs?_  
_Did you ever think about it this way:_  
_Half of the people on the planet have seen you turn into a cat and later into a monster. Still, everyone loves you?_

**Kyo replies: **I would probably freak out and stiffen up and freeze. Then yell and jump outta a window.

Huh... I never thought about it that way...

YO! That is _so _cool! Thanks for bringing that into light for me :)

* * *

**Hatsuharu writes:**

_Hey, you. We ever gonna finish that fight, or are you too much of a damn sissy?_

**Kyo replies: **YOU'RE the one who called it off, _pretty boy!_

OH YEAH, I AM _READAAAAAY!_

* * *

**Guest writes:**

_How do you think your life would be if Thoro never knew your secret and never lived with you?_  
_but you still knew her at skl and u had a crush on her!_  
_DONT DENI IT! ik u like her;)_

**Kyo replies: **I don't know who _Thoro_ is, but I guess my life would still be the same miserable thing it used to be it I never knew _Tohru..._

If I had a crush on her but she didn't know my secret, it still wouldn't be the same. It's like her knowing helps my temper issue and stuff like that. That didn't make sense! But I'm not gonna repeat myself...

I never told you I liked her... *blushes*

* * *

**just another me writes:**

_what are you waitin for you got more than 5 damn reviews come with the chapter already!_

**Kyo replies: **DAMN IT! BLAME AESIRSECRETS! She's a hobo that's lazy and wants to watch Fruits Basket more than write! You got a chapter the night before last night, so CHILL OUT!

* * *

**ihatekagura writes:**

**Kyo:** **HOLD UP** I _LOVE_ YOUR NAME.

Ok, go on.

**ihatekagura writes:**

_you would really come to Romania? please do. That damn kagura won't find you here..._

**Kyo replies: **Hell yes! I'm there right now! So is this chick here with me! She's driving me crazy.

Maybe we could... *accidently* *stumble* upon each other and *accidently* ditch, I mean *forget* AesirSecrets somewhere... *-*

* * *

**Toolazytologin writes:**

_Hey, Kyo! What would you do if Tohru's memory got erased? And what if Kazuma died? Do you think you will ever be able to beat Yuki? You should know that I believe in you! Oh, and about the Kagura stole my shirt thing, you should just go and buy a new one... Just me. bye_

**Kyo replies: **I WOULD KILL HATORI AND FEED HIS REMAINS TO MY OTHER CAT FRIENDS AND CACKLE IN GLEE AS HE REGRETS IT WITH EVERY FIBER OF HIS BEING.

If Kazuma died, I WOULD KILL WHOEVER KILLED HIM!

Yuki: What if it was a natural cause, such as old age?

Kyo: HE CAN'T DIE OF OLD AGE, HE'S YOUNG! AND IF HE DID, I WOULD KILL DEATH!

Yuki: Stupid cat...

Kyo: You tryin' to _SAY SOMETHIN'?!_

Yuki: And what if I was?

Kyo: THEN I WOULD RIP YOUR ASS APAR-

Me: GUYS, SHUT THE HELL UP.

Kyo: I WILL beat Yuki! I'm comin' for you! Time to pay the piper, Rat Boy! I'm here to collect!

Yuki: Wait, wait, I think I've heard this one before!

Me: _SHUT..._ THE... CRAPSNOGGLES... _UP!_

Kyo:... you said crapsnogggles. You must be pissed...

Anyways... thanks for believing in me!

I _can't _just buy a new one! It was the perfect size and the store doesn't have any more!

* * *

**jay 2 gabe writes: **

_Dfdghhjxjxjcbdfshzkgcbzsshdn xlsyduxhxidugchnckvohvbkcojd nm  
Keep wrighting:)_

**Kyo replies: **Djorjegorlvogmjvokemsl regjogsivmredfjcvsijrsiijregjr xz

Ok :)

* * *

**Dezrae2011 writes:**

_Hello nice meeting (just have to say you're very great at keeping in character their voices are in my head as I read this). Just wondering... what does a leek taste like? I mean, I don't usually like new things and I need to know if it's safe to eat or not. Secondly, this isn't really a question, but I have to wish you luck on your escape from Kagura, if some one that showed their love through pain I'd tried to get away from them to... I'm rooting for you! I hope you finally beat Yuki some day, he kinda scares me... Good Luck! (*starts humming high school girls song lightly then leaves*)_

**AesirSecrets replies: **Thank you very much ^-^ SOmetimes I think Kyo's a little too harsh and then a little too soft, like Yuki, ya know? But thanks :)

Since Kyo tries to avoid leeks at every cost, he doesn't try to taste the leeks... you get what I'm saying? I don't even know why he hates them, they hardly have any flavor. They taste exactly like onions except a LOT milder. I think they're pretty safe, but Kyo Kins would say otherwise ^-^

Kyo: HEY! This is MINE, not yours! Now shut it! THANK YOU.

Thanks, I'll need all the luck I can get... *cue scary string music*

Yeah! Another one that is scared of Yuki! MAN! You guys are _awesome!_

Me: I'LL SING WITH YOU! High school girls, high school girls, all for meeee! High school giiiiiiirls!

Shigure: Aww man, and you didn't invite me in? T-T I feel so alone! Why must you dears hurt me in this way? O! I feel my very own soul morbidly escaping my fazed body... I'm done for! Never will live such a man to tell a miraculous story such as my wonderful but yet grisly doomed life that I'm forced to exist in-

Me: HEY SHIGURE! Let's go to Kyo and Yuki's high school and look at all the girls! They're pretty cute! *links arms with Shigure and skips off like the perverts that we are*

* * *

**j2jay writes:**

_DAHHHLING_

_DAMN RAT_

_What?_

**Kyo replies: **

... ... ... ... ... what? O.O

* * *

**Luna WhiteWolf writes:**

_Dear Kyo,_

_Omg! This is such an interesting idea for a fanfiction! lol I seriously have no idea to write... dammit... *mind goes blank* Oh wait! Have you ever thought about what your life would be like if you weren't part of the zodiac and your personality was different as well? Okay, umm, that might be a bit personal... It sounds like it to me._

_And I have a Sohma OC that is a cat and she has a secret crush on you! ;3 lol don't go off on her though, she is way too shy at first and she might just want to smack you but then just storm off instead and might never be seen for a few days. Yeah.. that would be a very bad idea. So please don't do that. I'll hug you if you do and keep you in your cat form in my room to play with my cat Mittens! lol jk but still. Don't do it. (Mittens would prob beat ur ass anyway, cuz she's the queen of the house and she don't tolerate no one in her house that is a cat)_

_Signed,_

_Luna WhiteWolf_

**Kyo replies: **Yea, if I wasn't part of the zodiac- oh wait, I'm already _not _part of the zodiac... damnit.

I'd wanna see what my personality is, because I really could be worse than what I am now, and I dunno if that's really the best. Yea, it's pretty personal. But it's Ok.

WHAT?! Why would _she_ smack _me?! _I'll be pretty chill with her as long as she's not like Kagura.

AH! NO don't change me into a cat! I like being my awesome self!

BULL! I could probably beat _her _ass _any _day! SO HA! ON YOU! AND YOUR CAT!

* * *

**I love Kyo Sohma forever writes:**

_More please_

**Kyo replies: **Is _this _more enough for you?

AhruesnugjiulhAIHGRIFJ-OAMNKDSHGIODFHGkhgiorsngoti hgiousgjnvkfmrlkhsioyuoifvjmjfkdklnreiyuiosfvjk`vkdxgmjirojishyewkrsgnmlksgskfhiochjei gtirejtojregkeslgmgij5ijgrtregjklfdjgk fsiotjopryjekrsgjresjit89437648jfkrjgkdfjios[jgirt jksmglfdkgopw[jerjtksleejfeijawfwkamfwkepafuiewaik m fwia0[uf93utw2a3o'ojkfeoa'lejihawifgojeai'pfjmerij ferpafjmkipjrckjmt0[qe9awe'faepzfeawopf

P.S. fgkglsjerikjtueis

* * *

**lunar2eternalbluecomplete writes: **

_Hey Kyo! What if you had to wear the festival dress instead of Yuki? What would you do, and what do you think Tohru would think of you?_

**Kyo replies: **I WOULD RIP THAT THING TO SHREDS. I'm surprised Rat Boy wore it! And if _TOHRU _saw me, my soul would evaporate into thin air and I would never be heard from again!

* * *

**11 year old girl writes:**

_To Kyo,  
I wanted to know if u like drawing and exploring! Look! I drew u a picture of candy land with u and me! it has a little bit of pink, but whatever! (I'm 11 so I'm a still a little weird!) And I wanted to know that... if somehow I fell into fruits basket, and I was a zodiac cat, would u accept me as a little sister? Hope I didn't bug u too much!  
Lovesez, Allison_

**Kyo replies: **Eh, I tried drawing and I'm not so good at it. Sometimes I try again if I feel like a real crazy-ass, but I'd rather fight. Uh... oh yeah... very nice...

It's okay that you're weird, because you know what? AesirSecrets is a FREAK, so feel better about yourself.

Me: HEY! I'M NOT THE ONE WHO TURNS INTO A CAT HERE!

Kyo: *growls*

Yeah, I guess I'd be fine with you bein' my sister. As long as you're not like... *shudder* KAGURA.

* * *

**alwayskougacola writes:**

_AesirSecrets you're freaking hilarious and Kyo, I love your face! So, have you ever been high off catnip? If not, *shakes a baggy of catnip* lets try now and see what happens? Oh, and do laser pointers freak you the fuck out like some cats?_

**Kyo replies: **Thanks! YES AND IT IS SOME FREAKY STUFF... We should try it after this next person! don't remember what happened last time, but Shirgure said some freaky stuff and I'm not sure if all that was true and all. You gotta tell me what happens!

I HATE THOSE DAMN LASERS.

I hate going into History class because my teacher ALWAYS uses them and I just wanna attack the damn dot! One time I did... didn't end very well.

* * *

**Tohru Honda writes:**

_Hi Kyo-Kun I'be been reading some of these and wanted to ask do you like me that way because when we kissed (in the manga) I thought that you really liked me._

**Kyo replies: ...**

Uh... yeah, I do! I'm just... not able to really... _admit _it, I mean, I'm not really cut out for actually talkin' to people and all... _DAMN IT_ I made you worry again! You gotta stop lookin' at me like that! I like you, okay? GEEZ *blushes* You should know that by now...

* * *

**AWWWW Kyo's too sweet! *drools***

**Ok, I'm all caught up to the reviews! **

**Kyo: Come on, guys! Five reviews! And I swear I'll update!**

**Me: KISS! KISS! KISS! **

**Kyo: NOT WITH _YOU _WATCHIN', YOU SICK PERVERT!**

**Me: AHA But that implies you _will... EHEHEHEHEEE! _I'll turn my back :D**

**Kyo: *FUMING***


	10. Responses 9

gf

heh heh.. that was completely unintentional... I just randomly typed in two letters and those popped up XD

It's what I am surprised I have...

**Me: WOAH. **

**Uhm... that was... something that I wrote before copying and pasting these letters... never mind that...**

**Kyo: ...You have a girlfriend?**

**Me: O.O yeaaaaaahh...**

**Kyo: Well, that's two surprised people.**

**Me: KYO! I WILL GET KAGURA UP IN HERE IF YOU DON'T SHUT UP!**

* * *

**ILOVESOULEATERKID writes:**

_Hey KyoKyo _  
_Do you like Pasta and vodka and wurst and hambugers and tea and roses and bears and hello kitty and reading manga and being awsome and playing the piano and hitting people with frying pans SO MANY HETALIA REFERNCES IN MY COMMENT oh also Do you like pewdiepie oh also would you get mad if I wrote a story about you dating yuki behind tohrus back dating hatsuharu behind yuki and tohrus backa nd dating Momiji behind all their backs? anyway Aesirsecrets I love this please countinue_

**Kyo replies: **I like pasta

I freaking hate vodka. Probably because it reminds me of AesirSecrets... (she's part Russian)... Nothing against Russians, just AesirSecrets...

What the hell is wurst.

Hamburgers... too messy. And I hate how Yuki eats them like a princess.

I freaking love tea.

I don't know about roses.

Shigure: I can answer this next one! Kyo LOOOOOVES bears, he fought with them in the mount-

Kyo: I DIDN'T FIGHT BEARS!

I HATE HELLO KITTY. Even though I'm a cat too... I think I gotta rethink this one...

Me: AWWWWWW Kyo-chan likes Hello Kitty! *dies of fangirling too much*

Kyo: SHUT UP! I didn't say that!

I like reading manga.

Yuki: Probably because most of it's pictures...

Kyo: NO! I like it cuz the manga has the kissing romance crap and the animes never do and I get SO WORKED UP FOR NOTHING!

Me: O.O Ladies and gentlemen, make sure to capture this moment of history. Kyo Sohma has actually admitted to liking the romance in manga. O.O

Kyo: *fuming* aaaaaanyways! I am a BEAST at being awesome. I don't got the patience for playing the piano.

Yuki: Do you have the patience to learn proper grammar?

Kyo: I DON'T GOT NO TIME FOR THAT, PRINCESS.

I don't hit people with frying pans, my fists are good enough and WHY IS THE F KEY ON MY KEYBOARD HARD TO PRESS?

I don't know Hetalia. Sorry. Not really. But anyways.

Is Pewdiepie a blond guy? If so, no, I don't know him. If not, I still don't know him.

Are you DRUNK or somethin'?! YEAH, I'd HATE a stupid stor-

Me: YES! YES PLEASE WRITE IT! I'd LOVE to see what happens! *dies of fangirling again*

Kyo: You... stop... I'm taking that bottle away...

Me: NOOOO! It's tea, I swear it is! I'm underaaaaaaaage don't take away my teaaaaaaaa! ~waaaaah~

Kyo: *sniffs the bottle* Yeah, it _is_ tea... Tea makes you hyper?

Me: No. I'm just normally like this.

* * *

**Guest ****writes:**

_Hey it's me again, Carrot-Top  
Thanks for writing me back!  
(Yeah, Hatsuharu is a perv. LOL)  
Anyway I forgot to ask you questions last time,  
1. What would it be like if you'd never met Tohru?  
2. Is Ayame gay? (This is pretty obvious, the he has his hair but I wanted to double check.)  
3. How do you feel about all these letters you've been getting?  
(Brother walks in,  
Bro: Dafuq are you doing?!_  
_Me: Don't cuss!_  
_Bro: *cusses a lot*_  
_Me *takes a long iron rod and heats it over the lava in my homemade volcano, hits him repeatedly until he dies of blood loss*)_  
_Anyway like I was saying Kyo-_  
_(Police: Put your hands where I can see them!_  
_Me: Nope_  
_Police (Shoots me)_  
_Me (dies)_

_-Skylar_

**Kyo replies: **Hey again! No prob, I actually like doin' this.

I guess my life would suck if I never met Tohru. I don't have much of an imagination, so I can't really say anything else. Although AesirSecrets did start _another god-damn story _about me meeting another chick who's as violent and awesome as me, and there's no Tohru in that story. I don't really care much for it, but I guess it keeps AesirSecrets off my back, because she's drooling over violent romance.. *sigh*

I thiiiiiink Ayame is gay... I don't really know. But if you call him here... I'll make you eat that phone *pointed glare*

I like these letters. It's not like I meet these people in real life, so it's easier for me. If this was like an actual meeting, some idiots might want to glomp me and AesirSecret's too much of a wimp to keep them off me...

Me: HEY I TAKE KARATE, FOOL!

Kyo: Hey dude! You sound pretty coo-

Me: Dafuq just happened. Heh heh... I stole your word.

Kyo:... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... WHAT THE HELL JUST HAPPENED?!

* * *

**Sinnamon writes:**

_Hi Kyo, umm... do you ever read Fruits Basket Fanfics? Do you ever get jealous whenever there's a fanfic about Tohru and Yuki? I've read some, and i think they're sweet... i want to hear your opinion though.  
_

**Kyo replies: **Yeah, I actually do. Some are pretty good. I look to see if people write pairings in their summary, so if there's a Pretty Pink Sparkly Rat PrincessxOC pairing, I don't read it. If there's no pairing, I make AesirSecrets read it before me.

Me: O! Cruel world! Please! Save me from this miserable torture! I must... must... must update my other fanfics and study for tests and spoil my girlfriend and this insolent- I mean lovely cat forces me to read stories for him... please, o lovely world... cruel lovely world...

Kyo: That's gotta be the _stupidest_ thing I've ever heard. You and Shigure really are perfect for each other.

* * *

**the sakura trees writes:**

_Ummmm you're welcome I guess...  
Here's my question:  
What would be the first thing to do after(if, no offense) you beat Yuki?_

**Kyo replies: **I'll make sure I got a video of me beating his girly pants! And then I'll eat green tea ice cream. IT... IS... SO... _**GOOD...**_

* * *

**WoNdErLaNd Or NeVeRlAnD writes: **

_I AM BACK WITH MORE...perverted questions...*evil grin* I'm afraid you won't get rid of me Kyo-Kyo cuz I am HOOKED! YAY!_

_Allrighty then! Has Ayame ever tried to put YOU in a dress? I know he tried to put Yuki in one but...alas! Yuki kicked him up the roof and Shigure had to call Hatori and...*sigh* it was all a bloody mess._

_Try and picture Yuki (Or Haru) in a smexy bikini in a hot summer day...MMM-MMM! Tell me, what are your thoughts? Wouldn't you like to go and bring down the lower part- *gets wacked by my polar bear cub*_

_That damn bear..._

_ALSO: There are three HIGH SCHOOL GIRLS *loud enough to make Shigure hear it* and Tohru next to you. Would you like to F**k the three (did I mension sexy?) HIGH SCHOOL GIRLS or Tohru? :3 (Yuki or Haru is also an acceptable answer)_

_NOW! This really means a lot to me! Tell me, what EXACTLY do you think of Shigure whenever he's being the smexy pervert he is? Curse words or other things are acceptable, I just want you to be HONEST. Tell me what you wouldn't say in front of anyone about his perverted antics._

_In my honest opinion...I just LOVE IT when Gure-San is a perv! I mean...he's so smexy! X3 (Feel free to tell him I just called him SEXY!)_

_NOW! LAST QUESTION! Would you ever have a three some with Tohru and Yuki? (Or Haru?)_

_XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO!_

_WON (That's how my name looks if I abreviate (whatever its spelled) the letters...just saying)_

**Kyo replies: **Well, Ayame actua-

_WAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIITTTTTTTTTTTTTT! _

_I forgot two more questions...*face palm* _

_But I am not asking these, my polar bear cub coke is..._

_COKE asks: _

_Would you like to be turned into a pony? Or would you like to see the others around you turned into ponies from the MLP world? I saw a pic of all of you Sohma's (and Tohru) turned into ponies and I must say, you looked KAWAII! _

_Me: Yeah...but Shigure, Hatori and Ayame just looked SMEXY! *coke wacks me*_  
_Coke: Damn perv...cheking out ponified characters what in the wolrd is wrong with you? _

_Anyway! Also my owner would LOVE to go on a hugging spree...would you dare to hug her? If not hug me! :3 _

_Me: I would like to go on a hugging spree...but my target is the Mabudachi Trio..._  
_Coke: Shut up...by the way if you noticed the Coca-Cola refrence in my name I will LOVE YOU FOREVER._

**Kyo: **Ayame _tried _to put me in a dress, but I TOTALLY KICKED HIS GIRLY ASS! Yeah, I know about that... That was the ONE TIME in history I actually felt something like thanks towards that stupid rat.

AH! PLEASE DON'T SAY THAT! If AesirSecrets ever found out that you had an idea of Yuki in a bikini and bringing down the lower part, she'd screa-

Me: *sneakily slides over and wiggles eyebrows* WHAAAAAT about Yuki in a bikini and bringing down the lower part?!

Kyo: We're done for.

Me: OMIGOD OMIGOD OMIGOD I WOULD LOVE TO SEE YUKI IN A TINY LITTLE BIKINI WITH A FLOWER IN HIS HAIR AND THEN I'D SLIDE OVER TO HIM AND ACT ALL SEXUAL LIKE AND SOFTLY TRICKLE MY FINGERS DOWN HIS CHEST AND THEN HIS STOMACH AND PLAY WITH HIS BIKINI LINE, ALL THE WHILE GAZING SEDUCTIVELY IN HIS BEAUTIFUL EYES-

Yuki: Stop imagining me!

Shigure: What?! High school girls?! Where? Why did no one tell me? Oh, this truly is a cruel world, AesirSecrets *hold hands with me*

Me: -Indeed-

Shigure:... when people do not tell us where the cute girls are! Oh, let us weep! The life of an author is hard enough, and cruel souls tempt us with high school girls and not even tell us where they are! *we dramatically fall on our knees and hold hands, crying buckets*

Kyo: I'd rather go with Tohru.

WAIT I MEANT LIKE... I don't want her to get offended or anythin like that, but I-

Ayame: Oh, darling! We all know what you meant, Kyo-chaaaaaaaaaan... *winkwinkwink*

(A/N Yaaay! Ayame actually has a speaking part now!)

Kyo: GOOD, because I think cuss words are fit for this situation! I HATE when Shigure is a pervert! What makes me even more pissed is that he doesn't get caught! It's like he's the god-damn emperor of the world and never gets caught for shit that other people would get caught for! GAH!

*tries to calm down*

Shigure: *looks up from weeping* You... you think I'm... _sexy? _Oh, how words cannot express my thanks I feel this moment! _By the waaaay, _do you happen to be a high school girl?

Me: YAY! Someone who thinks my Shigure-san is sexy as hell! I LOVE it when he's a pervert! OMIGOD Don't you looooove it when he's in his sharp suit? UMPH, he's so god-damn SEXY! I love you. It's because you ask perverted questions and love Shigure even when he's being a perv. Maybe I should make a readerxShigure fanfic... hmmm...

Kyo: NO YOU DON'T, YOU GOTTA READ THESE THREE STORIES FOR ME!

Me; Ah, who cares, I'll make the story later when I have more time!

Kyo:... *sigh*

I wouldn't wanna be naked with Yuki OR Haru. That's really dumb.

I'd like everyone _else _to be ponies.

Me: WHAT WHERE DID YOU FIND THE PIC?! I think we'd all like to see Kyo as a cutie pony ; )

Kyo: *anger rising* I agree with Coke, you're really weird.

Me: But _I _love you! :D

Kyo: WHO CARES?!

And I don't know. I don't really like hugging people. Or anything else really.

Me: I'll join you with the Mabudachi trioooooo! *heart*

Kyo: ...yeah... have fun with that...

And I think your name is because of the Coca-Cola polar bear commercial played during the SuperBowl... am I right?

* * *

**Luna WhiteWolf writes:**

_Oh, I'm sorry... I meant, if you WEREN'T able to turn into a cat. Damn it.. I hate it when I don't read over what I write before posting something... I'm so sorry._

_She'd only smack you if you were mean to her. And of course she's not like Kagura! Oh god, she is a creepy woman! Though, she does have her moments ._

_Aww! But I like both you and your cat form! lolz I'm sorry, I'm a total cat-lover. Though, my first are wolves :3 I love wolves!_

_BITCH, PLEASE! If you even TOUCH a single WHISKER on her, I'LL KICK YOUR ASS! No one touches my Baby Girl. *narrows eyes dangerously with venom*_

_..._

_*sighs* sorry... I'm not a fighter.. never fought in my life... but I WILL cry my eyes out if you hurt Mittens. She's like the most specialist thing in the world to me (personal info alert) ever since my dog Dodger left... He was just so special... I loved that dog.. *cries just thinking about it* sorry... I'm such a pest. I'll stop bothering you now, I'm probably getting annoying and on your nerves.._

_Signed,_

_Luna WhiteWolf_

**Kyo replies: **You're ok, I hate it when I do that too.

I'll be ok with her as long as she doesn't talk to me much! AND GOOD. I have enough crazy girls in my life right now... I don't need another! SHE DOESN'T HAVE _ANY _MOMENTS!

Thanks... -.-

*deadpans sarcastically* I never noticed you liked wolves. That's such a surprise for me. Especially your name, you name doesn't give it away at all.

DID YOU JUST CALL ME A BITCH?! EXCUSE ME, but that's SHIGURE you're talking about, the female dog!

AND I CAN KICK YOUR ASS ANY DAY TOO! Just you wait and see!

*sigh* I won't hurt her if she's nice to me-

Me: WAAAAAH! *SOBS BUCKETS*

Kyo: ...What the hell's wrong with _you?_

Me: The trailer song for the first Hunger Games movie just came up on my iPoooooodddddd... It's tooo saaaaaaaaaad! God-damn, save Peeta! Katniss, my love! *breaks down and sobs freaking oceans*

Kyo: ... It's always best to ignore her when she's like this...

Woah... I'm sorry that your dog died... it sucks when someone close to you dies... I'd probably do something for you, but I can't really... do anything... seeing as I can't do anythin' over the computer really... You're not a pest. You're not annoying me... I'm kinda glad you told me about this. It's not real easy to let out emotions and all. Well... I hope you get better emotionally... hope to write to you again!

* * *

**Ayame Sohma writes: **

_OH KYO-KYO! I BROUGHT YOU A NICE POT OF WARM LEEK SOUP! *snickers* I HAVE PREPARED A NICE AND SMASHING SUIT FOR YOU TO WEAR ON YOUR FUTURE DATE WITH TOHRU-CHAN! By the way, have you seen my love Gure-San? I MISS HIM!_

And KYO-KYO! I COULDN'T BEAR SEE SUCH A BEAUTIFUL YOUNG LADY CRY, SO I HAVE TOLD KAGURA-CHAN WHERE YOU WERE! She misses you so much darling!

*skips off to find Gure-san humming a happy tune*

**Kyo repl- WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO, TELLING KAGURA WHERE I WENT?! LOOK, I'M SO DAMN PISSED I KEPT THIS WRITING IN BOLD AND INTERRUPTED AESIRSECRETS! WHAT THE HELL IS WITH THE LEEK SOUP?! WHAT THE HELL IS WITH _YOU?! _NO, I DON'T CARE ABOUT DAMN SHIGURE! DAMN YOU! DAMNYOUDAMNYOUDAMNYOU!**


	11. Responses 10

Hi there.

**ILOVESOULEATERKID writes:**

_Kyyyyyyyooooooo my oc from my story hates you_  
_My oc:hey wiskers it me the owl Wiskers got his own show huh WISKERS I BROUGHT KAGURA_  
_Kagura:Kyo my love_  
_Me:so kyo you mad bro *Troll face*_

**Kyo replies: **Why... why does your OC hate me?...

AH CRAP! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?! WHY THE _HELL _DID YOU BRING KAGURA?!

Kagura: KYOOOOO! I MISSED YOU _SO MUCH, YOU **IDIOT!** _*runs and tries to attack Kyo*

*Kyo chucks a bag of candy at her*

Kyo: GET THE HELL AWAY FROM ME!

Kagura: That's no way to speak to your future wife!

Kyo: AESIRSECRETS, HELP MEH!

Me: *smug grin... folds arms* Nope.

Yuki: *holds Kagura's chin* He's just tired from writing to all his fans. I'm sure he loves you, he just doesn't know how to express it. He's never been very social. Let him rest alone, okay?

Kagura: ... okay. But when you finish, I'll make you some chicken Tsukune (AesirSecrets: HOLY SHITZNACKS IN A BOX I JUST REALIZED TSUKUNE IS ALSO THE NAME OF THE GUY IN ROSARIO VAMPIRE... I HAD WATCHED ROSARIO VAMPIRE AFTER SAYING WHAT KYO'S FAV FOOD IS, SO I DIDN'T REALIZE... Heh heh... now I know why Tsukune is named Tsukune... he's a food... to MOKA HEH HEH HEH HEH *evil laughter* Ok, sorry, sorry, I just love Tsukune so much... probably because of Todd Haberkorn...), your favorite, okay? *smiles and skips off*

Me: YUKI you're so KIIIIIND! *glomps Yuki*

Yuki: *sweatdrop* Uh... ok...

Kyo: *demonic clouds appearing over head as he crouches and glares at Yuki*

* * *

**WoNdErLaNd Or NeVeRlAnD writes:**

_That reminds me, I never gave AESIRSECRETS the link to the dirty Kyo and Haru yaoi did I? XP heres the link! _

_post/38333447422_

_Now I found the pony one on google, but it SEEMS some jerk deleted it because I can't find it DX. TO WHOEVER DELETED THE PONY PICTURE, YOU'RE A JERK! _

_And yes Gure, I just called you sexy. Because you are! And yes...I am a high school girl..._

_Coke: you're screwed..._

_I WOULD LOVE IT IF YOU MADE A SHIGURE X READER FAN FIC AESIRSECRETS! I like Shigure X OC and another fun fan fiction type is Shigure X Tohru or MABUDACHI TRIO THREESOME! XP _

_I can't help it! HE'S SO SEXY! IMMA HUG HIM AND I DON'T CARE IF HE TURNS INTO A DOGGY...AND WITH THAT SUIT...UMMPH...WAIT BEFORE I MELT! _

_I am really starting to love you too AESIRSECRETS! *HUGGLEZ!* _

_Coke face palms: The embarrassment I live with...and yes that's the reference of my name! XD _

_Anyhow I'll just ask a question for the time being XD _

_OHHH KYOOOOOOOOOOOOO...come on...tell me of your dirty guilty pleasure XP (I'M HAVING SO MUCH FUN WITH THIS...) _

_Wait may hug you gure-kun? :3_

_Wait...I found it X3 I was using the wrong browser *facepalm*_

_Coke: she has her head in the freaking clouds..._

_SORRY! AND SORRY TO WHOEVER I HAD INSULTED XD_

_fs71/i/2012/130/9/8/fruits_basket_ponies_by__

_alright so Kyo looks all bad $$ with his wings and thats awesome, Yuki looks adorable! Hatsu haru...well he's still cattle XD and Shigure looks...UMMPH! WITH HIS LITTLE KIMONO AND AWWWW ITS SO KAWAIII!_  
_Akito is there too...errg...thats the thing I really don't appreciate of the picture...but the alicorn thing looks AMAZING!_

_Oh I'm waiting for that hug gure-kun X3_

**Kyo replies: **Wha-

**Me: **WATCH OUT, KYO, THIS FIRST PART IS FOR ME! *squealsssss* I _LOVE _the dirty Kyo and Haru pic! EEEEEEEEEEE!

I think it's pretty hot *evil grin*

Kyo: Damn it...

Shigure: How generous of you to call me sexy! Now I know that whenever dear Yuki and Kyo turn their backs to me, I can _always _find someone who can tell the truth like it is! Oh, you _are _a lovely young high school girl? Well, that's good, because I just made up a game. It's called "Fix the Writer's Block!" Now now, I know what you're all thinking, 'How can this possibly be _any _fun at all?' Well, what you do is one person (preferably a high school girl) goes into a writer's 'office' and then he explains he has writer's block. The girl then helps him with his writer's block like so: you slide on top of the table, scattering papers everywhere. I get upset and you take an end of my kimono 'belt' and you lean closer and then-

Kyo: YOU SICK BASTARD!

Me: OKAY STOPPING RIGHT HERE because this story is rated PG13 ^-^

But when I update Shigure's Write To! you might be able to get the full story. I don't do well with lemons, though... probably because I never actually had se-

Kyo: *ahem* I'M STILL HERE.

Me: WAIT, I CAN _TOTALLY _MAKE A SHIGURE X READER FANFIC! But I'll have to post it on my DeviantArt, because this site doesn't allow reader inserts, and I'm sick of re-uploading stories due to minor violations... I LOVE SHIGURE IN A SUIT! I JUST WANNA JUMP HIS BONES but I can't because he's in a screen *starts crying* WAIT, I'll look up Shigure cosplay instead and just ask those people if they could act like Shigure and then I'll jump their bones! OH WAIT, I can just preform some black magic and make him come to the real world-

Kyo: No magic.

Me: IMA DO THAT. Thanks for being awesome, WoNdErLaNd! I'm also really happy that I got your name reference, Coke!

Kyo: OK ALREADY, LEMME ANSWER HER QUESTION. Okay, my guilty pleasure is... catnip and... *cough cough*Tohru*cough cough*

(Mostly) Everyone in the world: AWWWWWW! KAWAII!

Shigure: Yes, of course, my lovely! You can *ALWAYS* hug me! I do enjoy the feeling of a cute high school girl squealing at me and hugging my irresistible dogginess! Oh, and Kyo's given up (seeing as how AesirSecrets and I keep interrupting him, so he's gone for the moment), so I will answer for him and say that the pony picture of us was SO ADORABLE! And you may hug me now if you'd like~ Hehehe~

* * *

**I love Kyo Sohma forever writes:**

_Hey i think u r totally awesome kyo an saying u don't like tohru i dont get it everyone knows u like tohru. Please answer  
Love, i love kyo sohma forever  
P.S. u r totally awesome and i love u_

**Kyo replies: **Thanks for saying I'm awesome!

*blushes furiously* I DO like Tohru...

Me: He's just a WIMP and still can't admit it, even when he's KISSED her and shit like that!

Kyo: HEY! Watch your DAMN language!

* * *

**Guest writes:**

_tooo funny LOVE IT!  
*rolling around like a pig dying of laughter!*  
;)_

**AesirSecrets replies: **Why... why THANK YOU, KIND SOUL! *hearts*

* * *

**Guest writes (I'm assuming this is a different guest?):**

_something i dont get:_  
_...kyo why does your family treat you like shit?i think ur amazing and if the cat was ever part of the zodiac i would definatly wanna be born it that year!_  
_so just know dat everyone loves u!;)_  
_...also if you ever see Akito, tell him every one fucking hates him...will you?(well at least i do)_

**Kyo replies: **Hey, thanks for saying I'm cool! I don't know why they hate me, and I don't really give a damn, as long as they don't piss me off... It's just _their _fault that they're such assholes. The people who do like me are awesome. Good job, people, you know who's the most awesome guy in the world.

Me: I'm interrupting again and I'm saying this for the whole world... I HATE AKITO TOO! GOSH, I LOVE YOU FOR SAYING HE'S AN ASSHOLE! STUPID DAMN ASS AKITO! URRRRGGGGG! Okay, I'm done.

Kyo: I'm actually not pissed now, because you said what's been on my mind for most of my life.

* * *

**Mahal writes: **

_Kyo is awesome._

**AesirSecrets and Kyo reply: **We know.

* * *

**Guest ****writes:**

_Hey kyo if you were a girl and had to marry one of the zodiac lovely men, who would you pick and why!_

**Kyo replies: **What the HELL kind of a question is THAT?! I'd rather die an old unmarried lady than marry one of _those _IDIOTS!

Me: Heh heh... Kyo's an old unmarried maid... heh...

Kyo: HEY! I just said IF I WAS A CHICK... forget it, there's no point in arguing with you.

Me: Kyon Kyon learns quickly...

Kyo: DON'T CALL ME THAT!

* * *

**lunar2eternalbluecomplete writes:**

_If/when you beat Yuki(if it ever happens, hopefully) what would you first say and who would your next rival be and why?_

**Kyo replies: **You mean, WHEN I beat up Yuki (WHEN it happens, DEFINITELY)? I'd say... SILENCE YOU DIRTBAG UNDER THE GROUND UNDER THE MUD! NOW MAKE ME SOME CHICKEN TSUKUNE. AND A FOOT RUB WOULD BE GOOD. BUT WEAR THAT DRESS THAT YOU WORE FOR THE FESTIVAL THING.

My next rival would be... SHIGURE!

Shigure: Aww, why me? You shouldn't want to mess up my beautiful face (not that you _could _anyways) because then the HIGH SCHOOL GIRLS wouldn't absolutely desire me anymore!

Kyo: The high school girls never DID desire you... -.-'

Shigure: They desire me more than yoooouuuuu~

* * *

**the sakura trees writes:**

_When was the first time you ate leeks?_

**Kyo replies:** I dunno the first time I ate them, why are you askin me this? I guess like when I was three? Yeah, let's go with that. I think I almost died.

Yuki: Hello Kyo, I just made some miso soup for all of us. I'll give your bowl extra leeks, just for you.

Kyo: ...

* * *

**anonymusblader123 writes:**

_When was the first time you ate leeks?_

**Kyo replies: **Woah, wait, what? Didn't I just answer this? Is this a repeat? Is this the same person? AesirSecrets? What the HELL'S goin' on?! Why the HELL did you put this on here twice?

Me: It wasn't MY fault! Maybe they're mind reading each other? I'm sorry if I messed up, guys T-T

Kyo: ... why're you so meek today?

Me: Love issues. Call it a crush. You've had this problem. With Tohru.

Kyo: HEY! Don't bring up Tohru so easily!

* * *

**Guest writes:**

_I LOVE U KYO!;)_

**Kyo replies: **Thanks! Although I would like it if we kept this conversation PG, seeing as how you got a winking face at the end... O.o

Me: KYO, YOU HENTAI!

(and not the drawn hentai, although that's acceptable too... ;) )

Kyo: -.-' I knew _you _wouldn't be able to keep this PG...

* * *

**Vanessa writes:**

_Kyo do you know that every one knows the zodiac curse and you are in a cartoon_

**Kyo replies: **... What.

* * *

**Guest writes: **

_Kyo tell Aisersecrets to update plzzzzzzz!_

**Kyo replies**: YEAH, AESIRSECRETS, UPDATE THIS DAMN THING ONCE EVERY FIVE YEARS, WILL YA?!

And update your other stories! People are getting impatient!

And re-load that other story!

An-

Me: WAAAAAAAAAAAAH Kyo's being meeeeeean to me! Try taking AP tests and having 3 projects for every class and then finaaaaaaaallllllsssssss...

Seriously, guys, school was kicking my ass. It got a thick stick, covered it with spicy jalapeño sauce and wrenched it up my...

ANYWAYS.

Once my life gets straightened out with A GUY WHO'S AN IDIOT BUT I LIKE HIM ANYWAYS, I will be updating more frequently, like every other day. Hopefully.

Also, if you're following my other stories, those will definitely be updated a lot more frequently.

I also re-loaded Write to the Ouran Host Club! because apparently stories like this where the author interacts with the reader via reviews is not allowed -.-'

So that is it and I LOVE YOU if you stuck with us hobos for this long!

Kyo: HEY! I'm not a hobo!

Me: Yeah... yeah you are. But it's ok. We love you anyways.


End file.
